[WolfEx]

The news room was busy with the smell of fresh ink blotching the air and the sound of busy fingers typing echoing throughout the small room. It was so cramped you could hear the breath of the person next to you and see the sweat drip from their faces. The News Room didn't discriminate, and had creatures and species of all kinds including the famous Karry Kremling, and the ever advice giving guru Yoshi123 tucked away in their respective corners. They were busy clicking away answering fan mail and working on their next columns, research never ends here! Sadly, nobody really got paid much, though. Some would say writing in the newspaper is a coward's job, instead of doing missions and fighting, but someone had to do it, they were lovers not fighters, writers not biters. And to help make people understand, the head editor of the Life and Times Paper, Goldstool, has opened the news room for a tour and informative visit. He was beaming with excitement to show others what they were really about. Goldstool wasn't the toughest looking chap around, but he was sharp as a tack and will give you the scoop wherever you are. He was proud of their little news room, and what they were accomplishing, and he knew he was going to be judged by the visitors coming in today, but he could care less, he just wanted to write, and teach others the art of it. The place was not spacious, but he still would jump at a chance of new recruits for the paper. This was his chance!



"Welcome everybody to the Life and Times News Room! I will be your tour guide, Goldstool, and please do not hesitate to ask questions as I go through this tour with you. And if you need to use a bathroom, sorry, ours is broken, due to the janitor leaving their job position to work for Bowser and to clean his messy bathroom. It is sad news indeed. So please go outside to relieve yourself. In any case, it's good to see all of you here. As you can see, the space is small, but I will be giving you the first half of the tour which is, well, right in this room!"

Goldstool expands his arms opening the room up for everyone to gander at and showing off their little writing corner. There were about 10 writers cramped up in the space, eyes glued to their screens, fingers stuck to their keyboards typing without stopping. Some would argue that it was painful and mentally draining to do such work, but contrary to popular belief, they all loved their jobs. Any day where you're not dying or risking your life is a good day!

"First thing you will notice is the workers here. They are all very nice but please understand you must not bug them. They are on the clock and well, work almost always. News never sleeps you know! As you look around you will see this is the main room, filled with cubicles of small proximity and tiny computers to get work done. I promise the environment is more comfy than it seems. This is the room where we get all our work done and send out the final drafts of the paper digitally before we publish them."

The room was getting quite hot with so much body heat, and Goldstool's head began to exude moisture creating a strange smell of rotting mushrooms and body odor. He hoped others could ignore it and keep attentive to the tour.

"After the digital format is complete, we send them to a processor in the back room where they go through the motions of publishing into physical form! But sadly for you all, this is where my half of the tour ends. The rest will be done by the kind hearted Koops, who so nicely wrote your horoscopes last time. But before I send you to the back room behind me to meet Koops and hear his half of the tour, do we have any questions or concerns?"

Goldstool really actually didn't want to hear any questions or babbling from anyone else, he wanted to get back to work and let Koops handle the rest. But ofcourse, reputation was important and maintaining an image to the public should not be taken lightly. So Goldstool kept his patience as best he could, for any additional comments from his tourists.

[Deleted]

The Pac decided to attend the tour. He had nothing better to do and liked to get out and see different things. He still actually still had quite a bit of the Life Sphere left to see so he was cutting down each part piece by piece. The paper was something read he used to read on normal basis back at, well, his home. Man, that really bothered him sometimes. Working so hard to get his new house (which he had actually had two made) and... he didn't like to think of the other part. Keeping himself occupied was the only way to avoid that.

Following along behind the mushroom person, PAC-MAN looked among the writers. He didn't mind the cramp space of the work zone as he had been in much tighter places before. With a hand placed on his head, he wondered how someone could do that. Typing as fast as he could eat. If they enjoyed it, then it must be nice.

Continuing along, the smiling ball kept a slow and steady pace through the office. He actually was needing to get the new issue of the paper so he noted that himself. As much as he would like to talk about the place, he was pretty sure no spoke anything along the lines of "waka waka" or anything arcade-like. Other than that, he was content and was smiling as always. A quick shake of the head as a "No" was his response to the toad.

[Deleted]

Klungo ooo’d and ahh’d at Goldstool’s every word. The newsroom fascinated him like a small child in a toy factory. He’d even made his own little hat to show his support for this place; the troll really enjoyed news sources and journalistic ventures, as no one really talked to him to keep in the loop of events. Sadly, he couldn’t do much in such a field because of his poor writing skills, his innate skill at being easily distracted, and the fact that he’d accidentally destroy any keyboard he would try to use because of his lack of control. Still, he envied the cramped little workers and how popular they must be.
Klungo was also quite happy to be in the presence of Pac-man. He was quite a fan, the ghost-eater being his second favorite hero next to the big BK, but the troll didn’t say anything to avoid embarrassing himself. It was all too easy in this day and age to do that, and when surrounded by nearly all of his favorite things, the last thing Klungo wanted to be was a laughing stock.
At question time, he waited to see if the yellow ball would have anything to say. When Pac-man simply shook his head, Klungo carefully raised a hand to ask his question. But it wasn’t really a question, more and offer than burned in his head after something the yellow Toad mentioned.
”Klungo could be janitor, has experienssse with plumbing. Fan workersss when getsss hot. Make moldy sssmell go away. I good with thingsss, learn from being good henchman.” He beamed proudly, looking like a fool, but a kind-hearted fool.

[Deleted]

Banjo and Kazooie weren't the type to enjoy or even want to partake on missions and risk their lives outside the Life Sphere. They loathed the idea of violence, even for a good cause, the two never found themselves courageous enough to step up to the challenge, which is why it was a nice little change for them to do something a bit more relaxing. The two of them always loved the newspaper, and to be given a personal tour of the News Room was almost like a dream come true. They took in the space with a great envy savoring the smell of it all and glancing back and forth at all the workers and the words they were typing on their screens. It was all very systematic and well organized, it was a different kind of team work and cooperation, not the fighting kind of team work the two were always a part of. This was definitely nice. "Oooooo! Kazooie we should work here! I mean, the golden toad guy seems nice enough, and it WOULD be doin somethin for the Life Sphere and helpin right?" Kazooie didn't seem as impressed with it all as Banjo was, but she saw his point. "Banjo, I'm a bird you dolt! We don't do well in small spaces. I'd feel cramped, tiny, and caged! I don't wanna be cooped up in here all day." An occasion where the bear and bird didn't seem eye to eye was never a good circumstance, but perhaps as the tour progressed Banjo thought maybe he can do some convincing to his old pal.

"Let's just keep walkin through the tour and see what else they can show us, eh buddy?" Kazooie shrugged, willing to give the place more of a chance, but so far it wasn't even slightly enjoyable for the energetic bird to hang around in. Too much clutter, not enough space. And to work under somebody wasn't really Kazooie's style, her working with Banjo was more of a partnership than anything, and besides, she liked the poor bear, their friendship also played a big factor in why she hasn't flown solo yet.

[WolfEx]

Goldstool watched as his only three tourists, well four if he counted the bear and the bird as separate entities, scoped out the room and genuinely expressed their excitement for the place. This was surprising to the overworked toad as he always thought the space was boring, stressful, and completely aberrant. He didn't expect that many tourists anyway, and four was a much bigger number than anticipated. He even had a question from the small crowd! That was unheard of for him based on his lack of tour guiding experience. With a fake smile and pretend enthusiasm, he answered the question, regardless of how off it sounded. "Ah yes, the janitorial position is open this is true. And so to you my large strangely shaped friend, I suggest putting in an application with us as soon as possible. And we will see about an interview, okay? Now, if there are no more questions, I direct you to the back room where Koops is waiting so patiently for the next part of the tour. Thank you and do enjoy the rest of the experience!" Goldstool gestured to Koops, and when he thought everyone was ready to move on and making their way over to Koops, he snuck away to rush to his office and close the door behind him to finish his mountain sized stack of papers he has yet to approve for the presses. That was one stressed out Toad.

[Mr. Game & Watch]

The news printer was hard at work, the low rumbling of the gigantic machine could be heard from the other room. It was quite amazing that the printer room was nearly twice the size of their actual work room, but that is what came with the field. In order to mass produce these papers they would need a lot of space, just mostly for the magnificent machine to fit correctly. Just from the look of it, one could easily tell that it was not just simply found in the wastelands of Li, it had to be handcrafted from the remains of ships from the Meteorite Field.

Sitting and snoozing at the control panel was the uncanny Koopa himself, Koops. His job wasn’t to handle the awkward piece of machinery, nobody would actually trust him with doing that considering how much of a space cadet he was. Not that he’s ever been to space, but his mind travels there like a second home. The person who was actually in control of the machine had to take a bathroom break, and thanks to theirs being out of order, it would take some before he got back.

It wasn’t until his ear holes picked up on the sound of Goldstool’s voice that he jumped out of unconsciousness and began to pretend that he knew what he was doing. It was almost like the sound of an alarm clock to him, so it became a customary reaction. After he pressed a couple of red and blue buttons at random, he instantly remembered that today was the tour day. The tubular turtle adjusted his shell like one would a fancy bowtie and sauntered towards the entrance to the next room.

He burst through the door with a smile on his beak, quickly analyzing their guests. His head first twisted to Goldstool before he left. “Aw, bra! This is the largest posy yet. Really pulling’em in, man!”

“Ah, wait wait. I think I totally left my manners somewhere else guys, real sorry. Alright, check it, I’m Koops. I do Horoscopes and a bunch of other bodacious articles from time to time. Not gonna brag or anything, but this is where the tour gets radical yah guys. I mean this stuff is cool and all, nothing beats a crowded room with a bunch of sweaty guys, but listen, stuff back here is gonna rock your socks.”

After a quick overview of the four guests, Koops was quick to notice that it was debatable if one of them even wore socks, the rest of them seemed to be sporting the bare feet, one of them going all out with his bear feet. As his eyes glazed over the group, they stopped on the bird for a brief moment, though they quickly shied away. “So… Uh, yeah, l-let’s just get going.” he mumbled as he turned his head away from the group and signaled them to follow him into the dank printer room. “Oh! We usually wear protective footwear when in this room, but yah guys should be aight. Like this one time I stubbed my toe on the big bertha over there” he stated whilst pointing to the printing press nonchalantly with his thumb. “And I only cried for like um, maybe five minute, so it wasn’t so bad.” His eyes popped as he remember that Kazooie was in the group. “No wait, I mean I didn’t even cry, I wasn’t crying so hard that the water in the room was being sucked into my eyes. True story, bros and bra, just ask Karry, he was totally there. It was so hardcore, I did like five times after that, didn’t even hurt. So, you know, you guys are fine.” he quickly retracted.

[Deleted]

Lots of work for a news station. He watched him run off to his office room then redirected his attention to Koops. He certainly didn't seem like one of the bad ones. It suprised the mascot quite a bit with the sudden entrance, making his eyes widen.

Entering the room, the size of the machinery had wowed him. Seeing as everything here was built from scraps and remains it was quite impressive. He had his big red boots on if that classified as protective footwear. He looked down at the then back up to the guide. The Pac let out a small laugh at the Koopa's story and continued on.

[Deleted]

2abe05
And when Banjo and Kazooie showed up, Klungo realized that this was the best trip he’d ever gone on. Now he truly was surrounded by all of his favorite things. It took all he had not to stare at the storied duo in admiration, though he did often steal a glance at them with a dumb smile on his face.
Klungo tilted his head at this new guide, a turtle. The way he spoke made it difficult to understand, so the troll could mostly only nod and pretend he knew what was going on.
"...Klungo no have sssocksss..." he stared at his feet in confusion of that phrase.
He forgot about his feet as they entered the room. The machinery had him in awe,despite its simplicity, inspiring the inventor deep within his heart. It snapped him back to the guide though, when he understood what Koops said when he mentioned stubbing his toe.
“Ooh, Klungo know ssstubbed toesss misssery. Onssse ssstubbed toe on Missstr-, uh, Bad Witch’sss cauldron, ssshe turned poor Klungo into fisssh… tried frying Klungo…” He frowned, remembering how good he smelled as his skin was burned into breaded pain.
He spaced off quite quickly, once again staring at the equipment as he harbored a desire to dismantle it and see how it all functioned. He moved closer to the printing press for a better look, hypnotized by the zigs and zags of the belts and gears going through it.

[Maverick Hunter Zero]

"That would suck, 'specially since some of us have loyalties to friends and whatnot." A mellow but gruff voice said as the Red Arremer Ace known as Firebrand appeared, apparently, the red Gargoyle had taken to hiding in unexpected places, mainly because he prefered to watch and observe how things were done from places like the cieling, which was where he was located ironicly enough.

"Now I don't mean to be rude, but I enjoy the news as much as anyone. I'd like to try to get a job sometime soon but trying to do something out of my league would push me to my limits." Firebrand said in the usual blunt manner, albiet from his vantage point from the ceiling so as to not be around the others in the area.

{Short post, sorry but my muse was needing some building up}

[WolfEx]

Goldstool was finishing up some important work in his office trying to rush through things so he could come back to the tour in time just before it ended. He dotted some i's and crossed some t's before shoving some papers in an envelope and stashing it in his cubby on his messy desk. He hurried in a sweat out of his office and back towards Koops in a wiggling run with his mushroom head moisturized from his sweat drops, and when Toads sweat it does not smell very good! He leaves a not so pleasant aroma behind him as he runs while the workers in the cramped space get a whiff and slightly cringe at the smell but continue their ever so important tasks typing away. When Goldstool finally makes it into the back room and rejoins the group he notices a new tourist oddly hanging from the ceiling and grows quite worried pointing a finger at him in protest. "Hey there red winged fella! That's not safe or sanitary! Nobody cleans that ceiling you know. I suggest getting down from there good sir. Especially if you want a job here, those shenanigans will cost you." After his snappy speech to the gargoyle he puts his attention back on the group seeing Koops finishing up with his tour and also how nervous he was getting from all the talking, Goldstool didn't quite like talking to crowds either so he knew the feeling.

"Alright everyone, now that we've seen the main room and the back room, there's one more place I gotta show ya, the recycle center! It's outside through that little back door over there, follow me! Come on Koops." Goldstool gestures to the group, and signaled Koops to come along so they can finish this tour together. He opens a small door just a few feet behind the printing machine and he leads the group into an outside back alley area in the slums of Rainbow Square with piles upon piles of old Newspapers and huge recycling dumpsters. "This is where we put all old newspapers that were either a misprint, or was just not desired by the general public. We store them all in those three blue dumpsters over there, and oh look! The Yoshis are hard at work stomping away crushing the papers down with all their might." The Yoshis looked so joyful with their tedious stomping motions to the papers as if it didn't bother them one bit, although the labor looked exhausting, they still stomped away. There were about four of them, all different colors, singing away as Yoshis often enjoy doing while they crush the papers. "Eh...don't worry guys, they get paid handsomely with fresh...well....to Li standards...pretty decently fresh bundles of fruit. And a few coins at the end of the week to support living costs. Good deal right? Besides a janitor, if anyone wants to help in this little recycling center back here you're more than welcome to apply for that position too, we could use another hand, or...FEET back here." Goldstool was trying to make working at the News Room sound as appealing as possible, though he was never very good at the art of manipulating or making things sound exciting. He tries though, he tries oh so very hard.

After realizing he must have shown everyone all there is to see, it was time for the tour to come to an end. He clasped his hands together and respectfully gave all the tourists a bow of gratitude for their time at the place before he said goodbye. "Thank you all so much for spending time here today at the news room! We hope you have gained an invaluable learning experience here, and we hope you come visit us again! If there are anymore questions, I will answer them now, also, if you wish to work here as either a Recycle Specialist, or a Janitor, or even a Writer, you can always sign up in our News Room front desk at any time! I have a handful of applications here to hand out if anyone is ready!" Goldstool pulls out a wad of applications and waves them in the air. "And as a token of our appreciation, everyone will be receiving a free one of a kind, only get it on the tour, CheckItUp Receiver! Or for short, CIU. You can wear it and use it wherever you are, on a mission, or in the Life Sphere! That handy dandy wrist watch will tell you the weather conditions around you, the latest happenings from the News Room, the greatest gossip from the Life Sphere, and thanks to E.Gadd's help, a built in mini radar showing any living creature around you and whether you're near an Infected or a friendly! It's a great tool that we want to give all of you to test out. But don't be spreadin this around, it's a special promotions ok!? Now...questions or comments? Otherwise, there's lots of work I have to get back to." Goldstool was nearly out of breath with all his talking, but delighted to see that the turnout for the tour was a huge success and he was anxious for feedback of the place by the others.

((ITEM RECEIVED:)) CIU Receiver. A receiver that can be used to keep up with all the daily news and Life Sphere happenings wherever you are! Other features include:
-Weather detector
-Date,Time, and Alarm feature.
-GADD Radar; can detect nearby Infected or friendlies in the area.
-Climate/Location Info. Can tell you basic information about your location and its history.
-Makes several different chimes to distract enemies or just for fun. Includes the tunes: Hyrule Temple, Peach's Castle, Yoshi's Island, and Brinstar Depths.
-Can also be used as a communicator with others that also posses this CIU from up to 3000 feet away!
-Comes in a slimming black color and attractive metal sleek design. Fits snugly on any wrist.

[Deleted]

Banjo was enthralled by the entire tour continuing to gaze at everything and rubbing his paws together at all the machinery he would love to get his hands on, but it was when him and Kazooie made it to the back room that Banjo truly felt giddy. When Koops described the printing machine Banjo began walking towards it almost drooling. Kazooie pecked him on the head stopping him in his tracks however. "Don't even think about it partner! I know you and machines, you can't help yourself." Banjo groaned at the peck and favored his head. "Ouch! But it's so prettyful, and clunky, and shiny, and...prettyful!" Banjo tries to reach out to touch the machine again but before Koops notices Kazooie flaps her wings and reels the bear back. Finally Banjo stops trying. "Alright Kazooie, I won't touch it!" Banjo sounds disappointed but tries to keep his paws to himself. After Koops was done talking, and before Banjo could butt in with questions, Goldstool runs in perky as ever looking to continue the tour with the group, and as he does so he points out Firebrand on the ceiling, Banjo and Kazooie look up taking notice and smiling.

"Hey look Kazooie! It's our friend Fireman! I missed you fire man!" Banjo waves a paw at the creature simply delighted to see him. Onward the tour keeps moving along as Goldstool leads the group outside to the alleyway behind the News Room. There a few large dumpsters are seen with dinosaurs stomping around inside of them, Banjo gets a little excited. "OH BOY! Dinos! And they have little cute bootsies! So colorful too! Oh man I wanna do that! I bet I would love the feeling of freshly crushed paper between my toes." Banjo gets lost into the idea of working at the News Room and Kazooie pecks him once more. "Come on now Banjo, you don't wanna work here, this place bores me!" Kazooie was not nearly as enthusiastic as the bear regarding the place, but she always tagged along anyhow. Banjo responded to her words with truth. "Kazooie, be nice! We both know missions aren't for us, and we need to help the Life Sphere somehow, so why not start by gettin a safe and responsible job here!" Kazooie couldn't argue that point, the two were traumatized by their last mission and didn't have the courage to go out and take on another one, at least not any time soon. This was indeed a way they could show their support to the Life Sphere, maybe they'd still be considered heroes of some kind that way.

Goldstool announced the ending of the tour, but also added an incentive, a new piece of technology for Banjo and Kazooie to play with! Just what the two idiots, well, idiot and a half needed, a fully in tact piece of artificial genius at their whim. Banjo couldn't resist after being given the gadget, he instantly began pressing buttons and fiddling with it. Luckily it was well reinforced and idiot proof so it didn't break at his prodding. "OH BOY OH BOY OH BOY! Look Kazooie, a gift! NOBODY HAS EVER GIVEN ME ANYTHING IN MY LIFE! THANK YOU SO MUCH GOLD HEAD!" Banjo goes to hug Goldstool, but Kazooie jerks him back as to not get too carried away with emotion over a wrist watch. Kazooie also seemed offended by Banjos' comment and calls him out on it. "Excuse you Banjo! What am I, chopped chicken!? As if I don't give you oh I dunno, wings and flying ability, or advice and moral support, and let's not forget risking my life for you pal in combat! How dare you!" Kazooie quickly shoves her head back into Banjo's backpack zipping it up as she does so indicating she was clearly upset with him. Guilt immediately filled Banjo's mind and caused him to grovel and beg for Kazooie's affection back.

"I'm so sorry pal! I didn't mean it that way! I just got so excited because of the watch thingy! Here...do you want it? You deserve it not me!" Banjo dangles the watch over his backpack with an outstretched arm, Kazooie stays tucked away at first, but comes out after a few seconds deciding to take Banjo's apology of the CIU and nabs it from his claws straight away. She mumbles something in a speedy blurb. "Thank you. But I'm still mad!" And she goes right back in the backpack. Banjo then notices Goldstool waving applications in the air for any interested for employment, Banjo jumps at the chance. "Kazooie, come on, come out! Let's sign an application and work here yeah?" Kazooie didn't care for the job, it wasn't for her, and she hated small spaces, to be in an office all day would destroy her. She remained silent. Banjo took initiative and expressed a desire for one. "I would like an application sir!" Banjo gestures to Goldstool for one and couldn't wait to fill it out.

[Deleted]

PAC-MAN had not actually thought about checking out the other tourists until the mushroom man had brought it up. Turn himself like a globe he looked up at the demon upon the roof. He didn't notice it due to the sound of the machinery and plus the fact that it had been sneaking around. It startled him a bit that something had been watching him the whole time but that feeling soon left when he looked among the others. Something green... thing in a lab coat. He seemed happy enough with his funny smiling. Must being enjoying himself. It brought a smile upon the mascot as he looked upon the last set of people. A bear with a bird in his backpack. An animal duo- two heads think better than one as the saying would go.

Peering outside the doorway to the recycle workers, he felt his heart 'ping' when Goldstool mentioned being paid fruit. A mental image of grapes were forming in his head which made him fade out from reality for a few seconds before realizing what happened. He brought himself back to the Life Sphere and made plans for a meal later.

A feeling of shock hit him when he was given a gift from them. He carefully took the band as if it were an item passed down from his elders throughout his family. The black band was snapped on his left arm above his orange glove. This was amazing, all these tools in this little piece of tech! This would definitely be useful for him.

Perhaps working here could work out for him, he could get a chance to meet the other tourists here and even get paid with the sweets of nature. He liked the idea of it. Of course, he would head out for some missions to keep things fresh but he liked the idea of it. He waved a mitt in the air for a recycling application. If further clarification was needed he would give a thumb gesture back to the yoshi's work area and bang a fist in an opened palm a few times.

[Deleted]

Klungo held the little device delicately and investigated. It could communicate with others who have it? Right then, two thoughts dominated his head: How amazing would it be to make his own little stock of these things! He could give them to all of his friends! But the little mushroom man warned against it, oh the struggle of morality... But the other thought that filled the troll with even more glee was that he now had a direct connect to the two, the only, his heroes! What a day oh this was too much to handle! He quietly made a happy noise as he closed his eyes and held the thing close, and then he put it on his wrist. Amazing, the little thing was still able to fit!

"Yesss, Klungo would like applicasssion too! Clean pesssky ssceiling!"
And to the opportunity to work alongside Banjo & Kazooie? And Pac-Man? At a newspaper? Klungo felt like he was going to explode from pure excitement! What a day!